So, you've been diagnosed with infertility, which suddenly feels like a blow to your gut. What do you mean I can't get pregnant, on my own, right away? Maybe your fertility treatments start off slowly with ovulation predictor kits and temperature charting. Or perhaps you kick it up a notch & your reproductive endocrinologist recommends intrauterine insemination (IUI) treatments. Maybe you're including injectable and/or oral medications. You might have moved on to IVF as well.
Whatever your course of treatment, there will come a time when then question comes up....how do you know when to stop? If you're lucky enough to produce a baby at the end and have a "live birth," congratulations!!! It will all have been worth it and now you have your little miracle. Enjoy every minute of it.
But what if you don't? What if you're endlessly trying and not having success? What if your partner wants to stop, but you want to keep going? What if you want to adopt and your partner wants no part of it? Whatever the scenario is for you, it is likely that at some point, you will hit a wall and have to answer the dreaded question of what to do next.
I will always say that it is imperative to have a back-up plan, no matter how far you plan to pursue infertility treatments. Come up with a Plan B, in case you need to abandon Plan A at any point along the way. This way, you have an option AND you don't need to waste more time. You can hit the ground running and not miss a beat.
If all else fails and you have exhausted all of your options, it's time to check in with one more person...yourself. Have you done EVERYTHING you possibly can so you can sleep at night, knowing you've turned over every stone? Have you exhausted whatever money you allocated for this purpose, only to conclude that there is no more available? Has your biological clock told you that your age is too much of a risk factor and to quit while you're ahead?
Whatever questions you can answer for yourself, I suggest you get comfortable with whatever amount of time, money, energy, etc. you've put forth before you call it quits. Grieve and mourn whatever you need to, but make sure you don't look back with regrets. Only you can decide when to close the book on this chapter and move on with your life. With, or without, children. Trust your gut.